Tuesday, December 21, 2010

The Day A Cow Gave Me The Finger & A Massive Lightbulb Moment

For anyone who googled ‘cow’ and ‘finger’, please note this is not a porn story, so move along right now thanks.

Ok so for anyone else, today I had a massive lightbulb moment courtesy of a steer (male cow), well a few steers, while they were ‘flicking me the bird’, ‘giving me the finger’, etc.

At work we have a small herd of 8 Charolais cattle, today it was time to move them from one of the horse paddocks they’d been cleaning out, back to the bush/dam block.
3 of us were up for the job, the new girl was hiding behind the gatepost to the holding yard, ready to shut the gate when the herd ran into the holding yard, the boss was on the quad bike moving them up and I was on a side, flanking them in.

We got them close to the yard and they bolted my way, so I run, well shall I say lumber off, and try to head them off before they get to open paddock and go bolting down the other end.

So while I was running in front of the cattle, heaving and panting, I thought ‘well Mel doesn’t this show you just how unfit you are’, then I turned round and the cattle all stopped, 7 of them turned back towards the yard, but 1 stood there staring at me, I yelled at him, waved me hands, and he just stood there, I thought ‘you cheeky sod’.

About 10 seconds later he took 3 steps towards me, I took 3 towards him, and we were having a face off. Steer v Me – now for anyone who knows cattle, they’re meant to turn away from you and be scared of you, not this cheeky bugger, he was just staring at me, like a cheeky teenager flipping you the bird, daring you to do something.

So I’m standing there panting & wheezing, red faced, staring at this steer, I ran at him, and he stood his ground till the last second, then turned on a dime, with a look over his shoulder at me that was almost a derogatory smirk, and went straight into the yard with his mates.

I walked into the yard, and he stops munching on the hay we put out to entice them, and just stares at me, now I know I’m reading to much into it, but I just now that steer, was saying ‘Mel go have a look at yourself, I’m just a stupid steer and I can see you’re not in good shape’.

So I went to the bathroom, trying to catch my breath, and saw my red face, messed up hair, and thought yes Mr Charolais, I take your point.

The moral or point to the story, 2011 is my year to get healthy and fitter, which in my case means losing about 30kgs, so wish me luck everyone, and Mr Charolais, or shall we say Nemesis, we shall meet again, and thanks for the inspiration!

Till next time,


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